The flight deck as seen by the captains’ wife
Isn’t he supposed to be flying?
A lady sitting in first-class saw the cockpit door open, she was incredulous to see that the pilot was reading, very concerned she asked a flight attendant,
“Miss, why is the pilot reading? Isn’t he supposed to be flying? “
The woman fainted when the flight attendant said,
“Oh well, he’s just studying for his pilot license.”
Aviation Cheat Codes
Worst Timing Ever
Thanks For Not Throwing Up
Big Red Switches – You Know You Want To
Airbus – Next Level Cheat Code
Men and Boys…
Airbus vs Boeing
Meanwhile in the Airbus Flightdeck
When your girlfriend says: We need to talk!
Fully Automatic Piloting System
The passenger aircraft was fully loaded and in the air after takeoff when the announcement came over the loudspeaker:
“Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve been working on a fully automatic piloting system for years that doesn’t need a flight crew and are proud to announce that it has been perfected.
You are the first passengers to fly controlled by software only with nobody in the cockpit. We are proud that during all our testing there has never been a mistake, mistake, mistake, mistake, mistake, …”
In Thrust We Trust
My favorite switches
Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman?
As the airliner pushed back from the gate, the flight attendant gave the passengers the usual information regarding seat belts, etc. Finally, she said, “Now sit back and enjoy your trip while your captain, Judith Campbell, and crew take you safely to your destination.”
Joe sitting in the eighth row thought to himself, “Did I hear her right? Is the captain a woman?”
When the attendants came by with the drink cart, he said, “Did I understand you right? Is the captain a woman?”
“Yes,” said the attendant, “In fact, this entire crew is female.”
“My God,” said Joe, “I’d better have two scotch and sodas. I don’t know what to think of all those women up there in the cockpit.”
“That’s another thing sir,” said the attendant, “We no longer call it the cock pit. Now it’s the box office.”
Very nervous passengers and two special pilots
Airplane passengers watch nervously as two men wearing pilots’ uniforms and dark glasses use canes to feel their way into the cockpit. The plane starts barreling down the runway, and the passengers begin to get scared as the water at the end of the airstrip nears. With only a few yards left, everyone screams, but the plane lifts off just in time. The passengers think it was all a joke, while in the cockpit, the pilots high-five.
“You know,” says one pilot to the other, “one day they’re gonna scream too late, and we’re all gonna die.”
Found the plane at the gate like this
Blue screen of death
Always keep a spare beer handy